How to Teach Kids Social Skills: Games and Everyday Practice

Social skills, like sharing, taking turns, listening, joining in and solving disagreements, help children make friends and get along at home and school. Like reading or riding a bike, they're learned through practice. Here are games, activities and everyday strategies to build them at every age.

Key social skills for children

• Sharing and taking turns
• Listening without interrupting
• Joining in a game or conversation
• Reading feelings from faces and voices
• Being a good sport when winning and losing
• Saying sorry and making things right
• Solving problems without hurting others
• Asking for help

Games that build social skills

1. Board games. Taking turns, following rules, winning and losing gracefully.
2. Simon says. Listening and following instructions.
3. Feelings charades. Act out emotions and guess them.
4. Pass the ball conversation. Only the person holding the ball can talk; then they pass it on.
5. Cooperative building. Build a tower together with blocks, taking turns adding pieces.
6. Team challenges. Can you get across the room without touching the floor, working together?
7. Memory and matching games. Our memory game is great for turn-taking.
8. Story chain. Each person adds one sentence to a story.

Role play

Act out tricky situations with toys, puppets or each other:

• Asking to join a game: "Can I play too?"
• What to do when someone says no
• Sharing a toy everyone wants
• Saying sorry after an accident
• Helping a friend who is sad

Puppets make role play easier for shy children. See puppet making for kids.

Everyday ways to practise

• Playdates. Start with one friend for a short time, with an activity planned.
• Family dinners. Practise conversation: asking questions, listening and taking turns to talk.
• Shopping and cafés. Let children order or pay (with support).
• Phone calls. Practise talking to grandparents.
• Greeting people. Hello, goodbye, eye contact and a smile.

Teaching feelings

Children who recognise feelings in themselves and others get on better with people.

• Name feelings in books and shows: "How do you think he feels?"
• Talk about your own feelings: "I feel frustrated because we're late."
• Draw feeling faces together.
• Use a feelings chart in your calm-down corner.

See helping kids with big feelings.

Solving disagreements

Teach a simple problem-solving process:

1. Stop and calm down. Take a breath.
2. Say what happened using "I" statements: "I felt sad when you took my toy."
3. Listen to the other person.
4. Think of solutions together: take turns, share, find another toy, use a timer.
5. Choose one and try it.

Social skills by age

Ages 2–3: parallel play (playing beside others), simple turn-taking and copying grown-ups.

Ages 3–5: sharing, joining games, using words for feelings and simple pretend play with others.

Ages 5–7: following game rules, cooperating in groups, making friends and saying sorry.

Ages 8–10: understanding different viewpoints, solving disagreements, loyalty and teamwork.

Ages 11+: managing peer pressure, deeper friendships and online social skills.

Supporting shy or anxious children

• Don't label them as "shy" in front of others.
• Practise at home first with role play.
• Arrive early to parties so they can settle before it gets busy.
• Start with one friend at a time.
• Praise small brave steps.

Common mistakes to avoid

• Forcing sharing of special toys. Let children put away a few treasured items before playdates.
• Solving every problem for them. Coach them through it instead.
• Expecting adult manners. Social skills develop gradually.

Frequently asked questions

When do children start sharing?

Many children begin to share more willingly around age 3–4, with plenty of practice and support.

How can I help my child make friends?

Arrange short playdates with one child, practise joining in at home and look for clubs based on their interests.

What if my child is bossy with friends?

Practise taking turns being the leader, and talk about how others might feel when someone always decides.

Social skills practice for playdates

Before a playdate:

• Agree on toys to share and put away special ones.
• Practise greeting: "Hi, do you want to play?"
• Plan one activity, like a craft or a game.

During:

• Stay nearby for younger children, ready to coach.
• Praise sharing and kindness when you see it.
• Step in early if things get tense.

After:

• Talk about what went well.
• Talk about anything tricky and what to try next time.

Social skills books

Picture books are a great way to talk about friendship, sharing and feelings. Ask your librarian for books about making friends, being included and solving problems.

What if my child prefers to play alone?

Some children are naturally more independent. That's fine, but offer gentle chances to play with others, especially around shared interests.

How can teachers build social skills in class?

Use partner work, cooperative games, class jobs and morning circles where children take turns sharing. Praise kind and helpful behaviour you see.

Do social skills improve with age?

Yes, with practice and support.